Fantasy by Warhol

This was inspired by Lightwing23's (referred to occasionally on this blog as Waffler) write up of the shamelessly derivative "Inheritance" novels. He's actually much nicer about them than I would be, but then, I've only read Eragon and found that to be more than enough. By contrast, Lightwing23 has read all three novels and is apparently willing to read the next one, assuming that Paolini can still get it published. Unfortunately, we already know that he can.

Actually, not all of the books whose covers I put on that image are terrible (Tolkien is certainly not terrible). What's terrifying is that even the worst of those books and series have devoted readers and die-hard admirers.

I've probably said more than needs to be said about tie-in novels, but the willingness of some genre fans to absorb the same crap in an endless cycle is never less than irksome. I mean, really, Terry Goodkind is a best seller? He's not even writing for a pre-existing fanbase. Unless you're counting Tolkien's. Or maybe Ayn Rand's.

This is probably one of the more obnoxious posts of late, even by the standards of this particular blog. I'll turn off photoshop and get back to playing Nightmare of Druaga.


  1. So glad that I found my way back into your blog. I was actually going to quote something from you in my post on Inheritance, but then I realized that I'd rather keep my own blog PG, or PG-13.

    But that doesn't mean that I can't post here, to the delight of all your adoring fans:

    "For Paolini, fantasy is an excuse for his masturbatory fanfic level dalliances in which he is the hero (Eragon=Chris Paolini, and I think he has a thing for his sister, since he once said Arya is based on her) and for Gaider it's a means to an end (game scenario). I hear that Paolini took a page from Goodkind and his next novel is going to be little more than a polemic for his political/social ideals, which is just perfect for an auto-fellating exercise like the Inheritance series."

    I heartily agree, though in more, eh, tepid terms. Oh, and I'm up for a simultaneous review of something whenever you are, though I fear our tastes rarely intersect. Perhaps a review of the crapstravaganza Clash of the Titans movie. Dunno about you, but I'm amazed at Hollywood's inability to get Greek myth right. I'd bet you my left nut that Hades is the badguy, and I'd bet you my other nut that they call him the God/Lord of Hell. Idiots. Can't wait to see it.

  2. I'm actually quite glad you didn't quote me, because I got something quite wrong -- it's actually Angela, the character you hated so much, who Paolini modeled after his sister.

    Would the term "auto-fellating" really earn more than a PG13? I mean... Really?

    Anyhow, we'll dialogue about a cross-over post and how to go about it. I'm not wanting to spend money on Clash of the Titans. The critics have already torn it a new one.

    How is it that our tastes don't intersect when we like so much of the same stuff? Granted, all the stuff we both like equally is probably at least a decade old.

  3. Back before the world at large managed to pollute our minds to such a degree? You're probably right.

    But that's good (ish) to hear about Paolini's sister. The downside is that now I have the knowledge that this character Angela exists in real life. If ever I see Paolini's sister, I can only hope that there aren't any sharp objects nearby. I HATE Angela! She should die a horrible death and get caught in a time warp so that it happens to her every day.

  4. Sent you an e-mail. Try not to kill Paolini's sister. He might not get much female contact without her around.

  5. And that's supposed to deter me?